When I was little my mom and I would engage in epic battle over food. Specifically vegetables since I've always had a sweet tooth and a deep unshakable hatred for anything green that comes from the ground. So she would tell me that I wouldn't be able to leave the table unless I ate all my vegetables. So I would sleep at the table, because my stubbornness knows no bounds. This went on for at least a week, until my daddy (in all his awesomeness) finally got my mom to back down. There might have been some sort of negotiation or maybe my mom just started coating all vegetables that came my way in butter, but either way the war ended and we went on to engage in other epic battles that had nothing to do with vegetables (and pretty much everything to do with my stubbornness).
Now that I do all my own cooking I pretty much get around this by only cooking vegetables that I enjoy (peas, carrots, mushrooms, corn, and spinach) and only cooking one vegetable I detest (asparagus) because Andy likes it and he's pretty swell. Plus he never makes me eat them, so it works out. That's kind of the thing with me. Its pretty much impossible to get me to eat or do anything I don't want to do. Which is a bit of a problem since my mommy isn't around to force me to eat my veggies, although my insane metabolism pretty much ensures that isn't a problem (for another 5 to 10yrs). What is becoming a problem is my inability to do things I know I have to do but I really hate doing ie. my resume which I am currently avoiding by writing this post. I know it has to be worked on to perfection except actually working on it is like trying to force raw broccoli down my throat-- its not going to happen with out at least someone losing an eye and possibly a spleen.
My solution to this is to follow my father's winning strategy for getting me to do anything I have zero interest in doing, bribery. Now you're wondering how one goes about bribing oneself without creating some weird existential crisis, but its actually really simple. I do whatever I hate in between something I like. So I'll eat a big bag of m&ms while working on the resume (although I'm trying to not use food as a reward since years of Oprah have taught me that's how people become obese) or work on the resume during the commercials for Veronica Mars. Its all win win. The bratty part of me wins. The responsible part of me stops feeling like a loser. For at least a little bit.
I'm not even going to lie though, the 80% of the time is just spent trying to come up with a way to get me to do whatever I don't want to do. Most people call this procrastination, and I'd like to share it with you by passing along these links:
* Facebook is the devil. It always without fail sucks me in and I lose hours (no joke) stalking people I never cared enough about to ever talk to in college, but who have awesome pictures of them drunk and making out with everyone on campus. I've said too much. Here are some ways you too can waste even more time on facebook. And this one is also cool.
* A cool ad involving Amish people. Drag racing. Need I say more?
* Top ten desktop diversions from Business Week. Via my favorite gossip site pinkisthenewblog.
* When poking around the internets for men style stuff for my bro I came across this and thought I'd share. Cause I'm nice like that.
* I always remember every detail of arguments with Andy thus rendering him incapable of launching an effective defense. Over the years though he's developed a pretty good shield against my freakish memory and that is to say it never happened. Although I know it did happen, because I remember every detail (to be honest though I would sometimes say he said stuff that I knew he didn't say because he didn't remember anyways so what does it matter?-- Sorry hun! I play to win). Anyways apparently I'm not the only one with freakish memory and scientist are baffled.
* The top 15 skylines in the world.
* Oh and because consuming only sugar will rot your brain here's an article to make it think, "Why all the turmoil in France?"
*Ah and the title comes from Morning wood's Nth Degree which reminds me of summer and if caught deep inside my head. Plus it doesn't hurt that the lead singer is totally cute.
marzo 29, 2006
marzo 28, 2006
We used to be friends.
I can't sleep (not a shock) so I'm watching c-span (big shocker). At first I was just surprised by how calmly and reasonably the senate debate was going. But then Sen. Edward Kennedy came on and the entire thing became easily the best thing on tv, because a) I think he's sauced (he's all red and slurring) and b) he totally owned another Senator yelling at him which pretty much scared everyone in the room but gave me a giant boner. It was awesome. You can watch it here (its Senate Judiciary Full Committee Markup - Afternoon Session and the part I'm referring to starts at 1:59:17ish). Even if you don't watch it, just know that it was awesome.
This whole H.R.4437 immigration debate thing caught me off guard, until the protest in LA woke me up to it (you can read a great first person account here or msn's account here). As someone who's an immigrant I of course have a ton to say on it (plus its my blog and I rant about dumber things than this all the time), but I'd like to read the damn thing before ripping it apart (although lets be honest I'll probably just rip it apart either way).
To get my head around it though I've been glancing at various stuff on the blogs about it and this particular post caught my eye. This is the first time I've come across this particular blog, but his comments on "la reconquista" made me so irrationally angry in the way few things do that I knew I had to comment on it. Ok, first "reconquista" refers to this idea that is floated around (typically after heavy drinking) that Mexico/Mexicans needs to reconquer parts of the US that were once Mexico. This guy is making the argument that this is a real threat that no one is talking about and that's why "we" need to do something (he doesn't specify what) about immigrants who have no interest in assimilating. Yea. I have a huge list of problems with his logic, but for now I'm just going to focus on this little jewel:
Oh how do I put this? Ok first Hispanic does not equal Mexican. Not by any stretch of the imagination. That's part number one. The second part may come to a shock to those who are not Hispanic/Latino/Chicano/whatever, so I'll do my best to break this down. This conveniently labeled clump of "Hispanics" don't self-identify as Hispanic. If you ask they'll say they're Puerto Rican/Mexican/Latin American/Salvadorian etc. Beyond that though (and this is the shocker) we don't all get along. At all. In the slightest. Each country has its own set of irrational (and rational) reasons for bias (and sometimes hatred) towards on another.
To get your head around this time just try to think of the nasty stereotypes you have about the South or the North or the Amish (ok thats just me), and then just apply that to an entire continent of people. Mostly because whenever you're trying to talk about Hispanics you're talking about a hugely diverse group that runs from white and red headed to black to every permutation in between, rich to poor, catholic to atheists, educated to non-educated. We don't all even speak the same language (yes, most speak Spanish but there are tons of indigenous populations that don't), and even those of us who do speak Spanish have completly different dialects and vocabularies to the point where even those of us that are fluent can have a hell of time trying to understand someone from another country. Blah. My point is that "we" can all barely agree on the correct way to speak Spanish (although clearly the Spaniards are doing it completly wrong) so I can assure you that there are no super secret meetings on reconquering Texas and California. Although if there are can someone foward me the memo? Thanks.
And thats that. I'll finish tackling this thing later.
This whole H.R.4437 immigration debate thing caught me off guard, until the protest in LA woke me up to it (you can read a great first person account here or msn's account here). As someone who's an immigrant I of course have a ton to say on it (plus its my blog and I rant about dumber things than this all the time), but I'd like to read the damn thing before ripping it apart (although lets be honest I'll probably just rip it apart either way).
To get my head around it though I've been glancing at various stuff on the blogs about it and this particular post caught my eye. This is the first time I've come across this particular blog, but his comments on "la reconquista" made me so irrationally angry in the way few things do that I knew I had to comment on it. Ok, first "reconquista" refers to this idea that is floated around (typically after heavy drinking) that Mexico/Mexicans needs to reconquer parts of the US that were once Mexico. This guy is making the argument that this is a real threat that no one is talking about and that's why "we" need to do something (he doesn't specify what) about immigrants who have no interest in assimilating. Yea. I have a huge list of problems with his logic, but for now I'm just going to focus on this little jewel:
That "demographic transformation" is almost here and it is unstoppable. Much higher birthrates among Mexican immigrant women means that by 2050, there will be more than 100 million Hispanics in the US comprising more than a quarter of our population. The current trend has more than 40% of Hispanics in the US living in California alone. That would mean more than 40 million Hispanics in California, the overwhelming number of them from Mexico, who would be a formidable bloc if Mexican irredentism becomes a truly mainstream goal.- Rick Moran
Oh how do I put this? Ok first Hispanic does not equal Mexican. Not by any stretch of the imagination. That's part number one. The second part may come to a shock to those who are not Hispanic/Latino/Chicano/whatever, so I'll do my best to break this down. This conveniently labeled clump of "Hispanics" don't self-identify as Hispanic. If you ask they'll say they're Puerto Rican/Mexican/Latin American/Salvadorian etc. Beyond that though (and this is the shocker) we don't all get along. At all. In the slightest. Each country has its own set of irrational (and rational) reasons for bias (and sometimes hatred) towards on another.
To get your head around this time just try to think of the nasty stereotypes you have about the South or the North or the Amish (ok thats just me), and then just apply that to an entire continent of people. Mostly because whenever you're trying to talk about Hispanics you're talking about a hugely diverse group that runs from white and red headed to black to every permutation in between, rich to poor, catholic to atheists, educated to non-educated. We don't all even speak the same language (yes, most speak Spanish but there are tons of indigenous populations that don't), and even those of us who do speak Spanish have completly different dialects and vocabularies to the point where even those of us that are fluent can have a hell of time trying to understand someone from another country. Blah. My point is that "we" can all barely agree on the correct way to speak Spanish (although clearly the Spaniards are doing it completly wrong) so I can assure you that there are no super secret meetings on reconquering Texas and California. Although if there are can someone foward me the memo? Thanks.
And thats that. I'll finish tackling this thing later.
marzo 27, 2006
This is a tribute to the greatest post in the world
This weekend was interesting. I played designated driver while everyone around me got stupid drunk and I actually didn't mind, which is I'm sure the very first sign that I am old. We left our house around 11ish and got home around 5ish and in those 6 hours I felt like Jane Goodall out in the jungle with the chimpanzees. I saw my very first bar fight (a big ol guy got sucker punched, smacked his head against the wall, and then got right back up like a weebel), saw some unfortunate looking women dancing on top of a bar (why's it always the homely looking ones that are the first to get on the bar?), and even enjoyed an all male a cappella rendition of Madonna's "Like a Prayer" (its as disturbingly entertaining as it sounds). Nothing earth shattering was learned (drunk people like to sing and dance and make inappropriate hookups), but it was none the less a good night. Mostly because I know that the secret to getting along with the deeply inebriated is to always agree with them, that way they have no reason to stab you with anything shiny.
So yea that was that. Sunday was spent with Andy wishing that he would have stopped drinking somewhere around hour 4 and me making a delicious chicken stir fry that was insanely good even for me.
Here are some light and fluffy links:
* Hot Jewish Girls video. Seriously. Its funny and safe for work. The very best line is at the end of the video.
* AskMen.com tells you 6 ways to tell your girl to lose weight. And when that blows up in your face how to get over your ex in 11 simple steps.
* Project Runways' Secret Lesbian.
* This fabulous little sign via the always entertaining nerve scanner.
* And what's with all the ugly shoes for spring/summer? And pairing them with leggins? yuck.
So yea that was that. Sunday was spent with Andy wishing that he would have stopped drinking somewhere around hour 4 and me making a delicious chicken stir fry that was insanely good even for me.
Here are some light and fluffy links:
* Hot Jewish Girls video. Seriously. Its funny and safe for work. The very best line is at the end of the video.
* AskMen.com tells you 6 ways to tell your girl to lose weight. And when that blows up in your face how to get over your ex in 11 simple steps.
* Project Runways' Secret Lesbian.
* This fabulous little sign via the always entertaining nerve scanner.
* And what's with all the ugly shoes for spring/summer? And pairing them with leggins? yuck.
marzo 24, 2006
Home is where my habits have a habitat
The truth is one of those things that's an acquired taste. Some people love it, while others hate it and prefer to have it only with a spoonful of sugar. As someone that spent a good chunk of my life trying to block out reality I've learned to love truth. In some ways this is my down fall since I encounter people who would rather hear a sweeter version of the truth, and then I come along and chop down all their rainbows and unicorns and then you know we cant be friends. But the thing is I'd always rather just know what's what. More than that though I like to just cut to the chase, without any of the niceties that normally go along with it. Like quit all the chit chat and just tell me if I'm dying, or your leaving, or you'd rather date men. Whatever it is I'd rather know now and be firmly rooted in reality than off chasing my little ponies. Or whatever. Which is probably why particular things just get on my nerves. Like fantasy role playing games. Like I'm all for expanding your imagination, but your telling me your a grown ass man and you want to dress up like a storm trooper? Its one thing if its a kinky sex thing, but if that's just your idea of a good time on a Saturday night I'm going to look at you funny. And mock you. Endlessly.
The thing is I completely understand that reality sucks. The world is falling apart at the seams. Not just here in the states, but everywhere. And that makes anyone want to hide under the covers. But the way to deal with that is head on, not by pretending you're a wizard. Because you're not a wizard. It just seems to be a form of apathy that's particularly troublesome since it to comes out of privileged white kids that have a much easier go at life to begin with. Which I know is a complete blanket statement that is based solely on the fact that I never saw anyone at the booker running around in a cape. Of which I saw more than my fair share while at moho. And not a cape as in a whimsical alternative to a coat, but a cape as in I'd rather be in Narnia.
I had a point. Ah yes. Apathy. So not cool. Especially if your privileged. Especially if you don't have a whole world of injustice coming at you since before you were born. The counterpoint of this of course if apathy amongst those of us that aren't white, or upper class, or male, or you get the point. Its one thing to be apathetic when the system or the "man" works in your favor, and quite another to be apathetic when your the one who is being screwed. Then it stops being cute, and starts being stupid. You might as well just walk yourself right back to the plantation because you're missing the whole point. More than that though, if you're not passionate about something, or angry about something, or sad about something especially in our current political climate then you're not really living. And what's the point of that?
That being said I understand the value of mindless entertainment. Turning your brain off every now and then ensures that you don't burn out a la "all work and no play makes jack a dull boy." In the spirit of this I present to you my newest crush via my guilty previously secret pleasure of the food network. The thing about Santos is that its very where's Waldo because he's quietly behind the scenes in every food network show (that's filmed in nyc). If Emeril screws something up Santos magically appears and makes things better. The knowledge that Santos could appear makes any show that much more wonderful. Because when he does show up he's always super dreamy and usually carrying an extra bowl of chopped onions or potatoes or breadcrumbs or whatever else the host might need. Oh and just so you know, that picture, totally not doing him any justice since a) he never smiles on camera (giving him a whole rebel without a case thing that I'm totally into right now) and b) he's a billion times cuter than that.
And now the links:
* My very first serious crush that could have turned me into a stalker, but didn't because I have more sense than that is trying to once again lure me into a life of endless groupiedom. He might just win this fight.
* For a while my big goal in life was to go on Jeopardy. I have since expanded my goals. However if you're still interested this might be your best shot.
* "Iraq is not your girlfriend. And if she was you couldn't treat her like that." Not a new argument, but one that I never tire of hearing.
* One of those funny online sex quizzes, this time designed to test your knowledge of sex in film. I did horribly, just so you know.
* Dog the Bounty Hunter is getting married. You care because there's a mullet involved in the wedding.
* I'm one of those people that loves being right. I'd rather be right than be friends with people, since I've learned that being right keeps me warmer at night than things like compromise or thinking before you speak. Anyways this post brings in a ton of people to my little blog, and when I realized that I was a little horrified since I was being particularly obnoxious that day given that we had just lost an election and what not. This article however reminds me that even when I'm completely off my meds I make more sense than most people.
* Slum ecology. A worthwhile read if you're in the mood to use your brain.
* Most rape victims don't come forward because they're afraid (with good reason) that they're going to be subjected to horrific personal attacks in the vein of "well she's a whore so she was asking to be raped." Hopefully this case can change all that, or at the very least change things just a wee bit.
* Funny video that further illustrates how incredibly stupid people can be.
* Slate tells us why gay marriage does not equal polygamy. My favorite part: "Fidelity isn't natural, but jealousy is. Hence the one-spouse rule. One isn't the number of people you want to sleep with. It's the number of people you want your spouse to sleep with."
* An adorable little comic strip, that encourages all of us feeble minded girls to give Bill Napoli a call when life's big choices get us down.
* How to become an early riser.
* A South Dakota newspaper refuses to run editorials on abortion because they fear people will get too upset. This post smashes that idea into tiny little pieces using humor and sarcasm.
*And finally a fish bowl in the shape of a fish. Very zen. If you're into creepy there's always this.
* Links of course come from my wandering around the web to awesome places such as Salon's Broadsheet and Feministing. Oh and the title is Fiona Apple, and if you didn't know that you are a sad sad person.
The thing is I completely understand that reality sucks. The world is falling apart at the seams. Not just here in the states, but everywhere. And that makes anyone want to hide under the covers. But the way to deal with that is head on, not by pretending you're a wizard. Because you're not a wizard. It just seems to be a form of apathy that's particularly troublesome since it to comes out of privileged white kids that have a much easier go at life to begin with. Which I know is a complete blanket statement that is based solely on the fact that I never saw anyone at the booker running around in a cape. Of which I saw more than my fair share while at moho. And not a cape as in a whimsical alternative to a coat, but a cape as in I'd rather be in Narnia.
I had a point. Ah yes. Apathy. So not cool. Especially if your privileged. Especially if you don't have a whole world of injustice coming at you since before you were born. The counterpoint of this of course if apathy amongst those of us that aren't white, or upper class, or male, or you get the point. Its one thing to be apathetic when the system or the "man" works in your favor, and quite another to be apathetic when your the one who is being screwed. Then it stops being cute, and starts being stupid. You might as well just walk yourself right back to the plantation because you're missing the whole point. More than that though, if you're not passionate about something, or angry about something, or sad about something especially in our current political climate then you're not really living. And what's the point of that?
That being said I understand the value of mindless entertainment. Turning your brain off every now and then ensures that you don't burn out a la "all work and no play makes jack a dull boy." In the spirit of this I present to you my newest crush via my guilty previously secret pleasure of the food network. The thing about Santos is that its very where's Waldo because he's quietly behind the scenes in every food network show (that's filmed in nyc). If Emeril screws something up Santos magically appears and makes things better. The knowledge that Santos could appear makes any show that much more wonderful. Because when he does show up he's always super dreamy and usually carrying an extra bowl of chopped onions or potatoes or breadcrumbs or whatever else the host might need. Oh and just so you know, that picture, totally not doing him any justice since a) he never smiles on camera (giving him a whole rebel without a case thing that I'm totally into right now) and b) he's a billion times cuter than that.
And now the links:
* My very first serious crush that could have turned me into a stalker, but didn't because I have more sense than that is trying to once again lure me into a life of endless groupiedom. He might just win this fight.
* For a while my big goal in life was to go on Jeopardy. I have since expanded my goals. However if you're still interested this might be your best shot.
* "Iraq is not your girlfriend. And if she was you couldn't treat her like that." Not a new argument, but one that I never tire of hearing.
* One of those funny online sex quizzes, this time designed to test your knowledge of sex in film. I did horribly, just so you know.
* Dog the Bounty Hunter is getting married. You care because there's a mullet involved in the wedding.
* I'm one of those people that loves being right. I'd rather be right than be friends with people, since I've learned that being right keeps me warmer at night than things like compromise or thinking before you speak. Anyways this post brings in a ton of people to my little blog, and when I realized that I was a little horrified since I was being particularly obnoxious that day given that we had just lost an election and what not. This article however reminds me that even when I'm completely off my meds I make more sense than most people.
* Slum ecology. A worthwhile read if you're in the mood to use your brain.
* Most rape victims don't come forward because they're afraid (with good reason) that they're going to be subjected to horrific personal attacks in the vein of "well she's a whore so she was asking to be raped." Hopefully this case can change all that, or at the very least change things just a wee bit.
* Funny video that further illustrates how incredibly stupid people can be.
* Slate tells us why gay marriage does not equal polygamy. My favorite part: "Fidelity isn't natural, but jealousy is. Hence the one-spouse rule. One isn't the number of people you want to sleep with. It's the number of people you want your spouse to sleep with."
* An adorable little comic strip, that encourages all of us feeble minded girls to give Bill Napoli a call when life's big choices get us down.
* How to become an early riser.
* A South Dakota newspaper refuses to run editorials on abortion because they fear people will get too upset. This post smashes that idea into tiny little pieces using humor and sarcasm.
*And finally a fish bowl in the shape of a fish. Very zen. If you're into creepy there's always this.
* Links of course come from my wandering around the web to awesome places such as Salon's Broadsheet and Feministing. Oh and the title is Fiona Apple, and if you didn't know that you are a sad sad person.
marzo 22, 2006
Do you eat, sleep, do you breathe me anymore?*
Growing up is so seriously over rated. Its all pay bills, wash the dishes, vacuum, laundry, rinse, and repeat. Blah. I'm so sick of it. I'd like to go back to the days of skipping class to go make out between bouts of mario tennis. Its funny though because all I could think of then was that I couldn't wait to go away to college, and then I got to college and realized it was all class, papers and all nighters and not nearly enough partying and making out with boys. Although the reason I went to moho was to focus on my brain and get away from all the boys and the drama. Which was good and all, but maybe I over did it. Once I was in college all I could think was that I couldn't wait until I didn't have to wake up and go to class anymore because how fabulous would it be to be able to read books for fun and have my own kitchen. And here I am out of college and its all real life hum drum and not nearly enough grilled cheese sandwiches and sun bathing on the hill while pretending to do work. I guess the big realization is that there's not nearly enough making out in the "real world," which sucks because there's nothing like a good make out session to fuzz out your brain and talk you down from the ledge.
Did I just grown up too fast or not nearly fast enough? Cause here I am packing up my life and being someone's faux wife and once again longing to be working on my tan and drinking something with a tiny umbrella in it so is it that I rushed into being an "adult" and having an adult relationship or that I just need to suck it up and learn that this is grown up life and it only gets worse from here. I wish more of life came with surgeon general warnings like "moving in with this boy is going to crush your will to live/your heart" or "being a grown up means you have to wash the dishes all the time" or "graduating from college means your bff no longer lives across the hall from you and you have to suck it up like a big girl because life is hard and grown up's drown their sorrows with a glass of wine which you should learn to like because drinking hard alcohol at dinner makes you look like an alcoholic." Blah.
I hate the realization that this isn't the life I want to be living because it means I have to do something about it. When I've much rather hide and pretend its not happening. Cause that always worked so well for me. Although really why am I complaining about anything? Life should be super sweet for me. I don't have to work some shitty job I hate or live in some shitty apartment because Andy takes good care of me, but it seems that I'm missing that gold digger gene or the house wife gene because I'd much rather be on my own paying my own bills instead of playing house. Life would be like a billion percent easier if I was stupid/less ambitious. Damn my parents for ever teaching me to read and that I could do anything I wanted. This is all their fault.
Enough of this emo post. Today's title comes via Lisa Loeb's "Do you sleep?" which was the soundtrack for this post. And yes I am channeling my middle school angst, thanks for asking. Here are the links:
* If you don't use gmail you should this is why.
* You are what you post. Another article that serves to remind us that the internet is a big place that forgets nothing so you should probably take down that picture of you doing shots off that 13yr old girl before the cops come busting through your door. Speaking of which my blog no longer comes up when I google my name, which is awesome.
* Cindy Sheeham's article on the three year anniversary of the Iraq war. Powerful awesome stuff, go read it.
* Somewhat related is McSweeney's "Parallels Between My Living Through Two Years of Middle School and the Two Terms of the Bush Presidency." Its funny but its McSweeney's what else do you expect?
* My favorite advice columnist tackles my current crisis of being 23 and sucking at life.
* Funny funny recap of my favorite show: America's Next Top Model. Yea, I said it, its my favorite show.
* Without a doubt my absolute hands down favorite thing on the internet is New York Magazine's Look Book. Every week when it comes out its like xmas.
* "How to lose a girl in ten words" a wonderful post by one of my favorite bloggers. Also a perfect example of why I just stick to boys from Texas since even when they're complete idiots (or convicted felons) they always remember to treat girls like girls and not frat brothers.
* Whiny insecure kids grow up to watch Fox News while self reliant kids (such as myself) grow up to be liberals. Sometimes I love science.
* "The real keepers of the American flame, the real practitioners of daily love and a life of the spirit, are gay and lesbian parents. They are, gosh darn it, what made this country great. Someone get a damn fife and drum." Make sure to read the rest of Jon Carroll's awesome column.
* The supreme court is hearing arguments that could seriously impact the prosecution of domestic violence cases. Read a good op-ed of it here.
* "Why Republicans are the best party in bed." Although funny (number 7 is my personal favorite) it does nothing to change my view that being a republican is the ultimate turnoff.
* I watched V for Vendetta this weekend. I of course loved it, even though its not the type of movie that I normally enjoy (action films are not my thing) because I am a bleeding heart liberal. Some critics hated it others loved it. I say watch it yourself and make up your own damn mind, if only because Natalie Portman is hot and doesn't pick bad movies (she needed the money to pay for Harvard hence the bad Star Wars movies, it was either that or turn tricks and you know she's too classy to go down like that).
*The links came from the usual suspects: kottle, salon's broadsheet, and feministing.
Did I just grown up too fast or not nearly fast enough? Cause here I am packing up my life and being someone's faux wife and once again longing to be working on my tan and drinking something with a tiny umbrella in it so is it that I rushed into being an "adult" and having an adult relationship or that I just need to suck it up and learn that this is grown up life and it only gets worse from here. I wish more of life came with surgeon general warnings like "moving in with this boy is going to crush your will to live/your heart" or "being a grown up means you have to wash the dishes all the time" or "graduating from college means your bff no longer lives across the hall from you and you have to suck it up like a big girl because life is hard and grown up's drown their sorrows with a glass of wine which you should learn to like because drinking hard alcohol at dinner makes you look like an alcoholic." Blah.
I hate the realization that this isn't the life I want to be living because it means I have to do something about it. When I've much rather hide and pretend its not happening. Cause that always worked so well for me. Although really why am I complaining about anything? Life should be super sweet for me. I don't have to work some shitty job I hate or live in some shitty apartment because Andy takes good care of me, but it seems that I'm missing that gold digger gene or the house wife gene because I'd much rather be on my own paying my own bills instead of playing house. Life would be like a billion percent easier if I was stupid/less ambitious. Damn my parents for ever teaching me to read and that I could do anything I wanted. This is all their fault.
Enough of this emo post. Today's title comes via Lisa Loeb's "Do you sleep?" which was the soundtrack for this post. And yes I am channeling my middle school angst, thanks for asking. Here are the links:
* If you don't use gmail you should this is why.
* You are what you post. Another article that serves to remind us that the internet is a big place that forgets nothing so you should probably take down that picture of you doing shots off that 13yr old girl before the cops come busting through your door. Speaking of which my blog no longer comes up when I google my name, which is awesome.
* Cindy Sheeham's article on the three year anniversary of the Iraq war. Powerful awesome stuff, go read it.
* Somewhat related is McSweeney's "Parallels Between My Living Through Two Years of Middle School and the Two Terms of the Bush Presidency." Its funny but its McSweeney's what else do you expect?
* My favorite advice columnist tackles my current crisis of being 23 and sucking at life.
* Funny funny recap of my favorite show: America's Next Top Model. Yea, I said it, its my favorite show.
* Without a doubt my absolute hands down favorite thing on the internet is New York Magazine's Look Book. Every week when it comes out its like xmas.
* "How to lose a girl in ten words" a wonderful post by one of my favorite bloggers. Also a perfect example of why I just stick to boys from Texas since even when they're complete idiots (or convicted felons) they always remember to treat girls like girls and not frat brothers.
* Whiny insecure kids grow up to watch Fox News while self reliant kids (such as myself) grow up to be liberals. Sometimes I love science.
* "The real keepers of the American flame, the real practitioners of daily love and a life of the spirit, are gay and lesbian parents. They are, gosh darn it, what made this country great. Someone get a damn fife and drum." Make sure to read the rest of Jon Carroll's awesome column.
* The supreme court is hearing arguments that could seriously impact the prosecution of domestic violence cases. Read a good op-ed of it here.
* "Why Republicans are the best party in bed." Although funny (number 7 is my personal favorite) it does nothing to change my view that being a republican is the ultimate turnoff.
* I watched V for Vendetta this weekend. I of course loved it, even though its not the type of movie that I normally enjoy (action films are not my thing) because I am a bleeding heart liberal. Some critics hated it others loved it. I say watch it yourself and make up your own damn mind, if only because Natalie Portman is hot and doesn't pick bad movies (she needed the money to pay for Harvard hence the bad Star Wars movies, it was either that or turn tricks and you know she's too classy to go down like that).
*The links came from the usual suspects: kottle, salon's broadsheet, and feministing.
marzo 20, 2006
Why so blue panda bear?*
Before I begin a small clarification on the last post. First I am by no means a porn expert or porn connoisseur. I was merely attempting to figure out why as a very liberal open minded person porn made me feel so icky. It wasn't meant as the end all be all argument against porn. Oh and I really was talking more about two dimensional porn (as in images) than video porn or live action porn neither of which I'm familiar enough to speak about. And that's that.
On a vaguely related note though, you must read this article in GQ about Adriana Lima (who I must admit is my current favorite super model) in which she states that sex is just for after marriage. What follows after that is probably the most unintentionally funny interview that I've read in a while, since its pretty clear the interviewer doesn't believe her assertions that she's a virgin. Although can you blame him? The reason Adriana Lima is one of the highest paid models is because she looks like sex, no matter what you put her in she just exudes sex. Which is a pretty cool trick, but I guess makes people assume things about you which might not be true. Which leads me to wonder if she's just playing a jedi mind trick and lying or if she's really serious. And why do I care? Why do we ever care if someone is or is not a virgin? Does the allusion of virginity really make someone that much more attractive? And why is no one asking any equally hunky men about their virginal status?
That's all I got. Oh and the title comes from this fabulous little ad which is so insanely creepy its funny. And now the links:
* A great article on a course on African-American sexuality and how it attempts to have students of color rethink what's natural.
* A list of the 100 most overlooked films in the 90s.
* A fabulous post on why I don't have the energy to read another article on why feminism makes women unhappy. Its short, its funny, go read it.
* Who knew social embarrassment was the way to make assholes quit buying hummers? I wonder what else we can apply this to.
* Apparently strippers have unions in Australia. And their unions actually accomplish stuff.
* The egg donor business booms college campuses.
* The battle to ban birth control. A long but worth while article on the new tactic of creating regulations against things we all know and love like the pill and condoms. Here's a small excerpt:
"While no one is suggesting that activists like Worthington will ever succeed in outlawing condoms or the pill, they are making incremental progress in passing laws that are making access to birth control more difficult. Of the 23 states that mandate employers to provide insured coverage for prescription contraceptives to their employees, 14 have exemptions for religious employers, and Missouri allows any employer, religious or secular, to deny coverage for any kind of contraception. During the 2005 legislative session, more that 80 bills in 36 states were introduced that would restrict minors' access to birth control. [...] And then there is the matter of pharmacists and "conscience clause" laws. South Dakota, Arkansas, Georgia and Mississippi already allow pharmacists to refuse to fill contraceptive prescriptions. And at least 15 states have legislation pending that would allow not just pharmacists to refuse to dispense prescriptions, but would also protect cashiers who refused to ring them up. "
On a vaguely related note though, you must read this article in GQ about Adriana Lima (who I must admit is my current favorite super model) in which she states that sex is just for after marriage. What follows after that is probably the most unintentionally funny interview that I've read in a while, since its pretty clear the interviewer doesn't believe her assertions that she's a virgin. Although can you blame him? The reason Adriana Lima is one of the highest paid models is because she looks like sex, no matter what you put her in she just exudes sex. Which is a pretty cool trick, but I guess makes people assume things about you which might not be true. Which leads me to wonder if she's just playing a jedi mind trick and lying or if she's really serious. And why do I care? Why do we ever care if someone is or is not a virgin? Does the allusion of virginity really make someone that much more attractive? And why is no one asking any equally hunky men about their virginal status?
That's all I got. Oh and the title comes from this fabulous little ad which is so insanely creepy its funny. And now the links:
* A great article on a course on African-American sexuality and how it attempts to have students of color rethink what's natural.
* A list of the 100 most overlooked films in the 90s.
* A fabulous post on why I don't have the energy to read another article on why feminism makes women unhappy. Its short, its funny, go read it.
* Who knew social embarrassment was the way to make assholes quit buying hummers? I wonder what else we can apply this to.
* Apparently strippers have unions in Australia. And their unions actually accomplish stuff.
* The egg donor business booms college campuses.
* The battle to ban birth control. A long but worth while article on the new tactic of creating regulations against things we all know and love like the pill and condoms. Here's a small excerpt:
"While no one is suggesting that activists like Worthington will ever succeed in outlawing condoms or the pill, they are making incremental progress in passing laws that are making access to birth control more difficult. Of the 23 states that mandate employers to provide insured coverage for prescription contraceptives to their employees, 14 have exemptions for religious employers, and Missouri allows any employer, religious or secular, to deny coverage for any kind of contraception. During the 2005 legislative session, more that 80 bills in 36 states were introduced that would restrict minors' access to birth control. [...] And then there is the matter of pharmacists and "conscience clause" laws. South Dakota, Arkansas, Georgia and Mississippi already allow pharmacists to refuse to fill contraceptive prescriptions. And at least 15 states have legislation pending that would allow not just pharmacists to refuse to dispense prescriptions, but would also protect cashiers who refused to ring them up. "
marzo 18, 2006
Porn does more than kill kittens
As a card carrying feminist it should come as no surprise that me and porn are not friends. My reasons however have very little to do with feminism. Its not the objectification or exploitation of women in porn that bothers me, even though I do think that women are objectified as sexual playthings in porn and that this is bad for women as a whole. But it doesn't bother me since I'm sure there are women that are into that kind of thing and have really turned the objectification into real tangible power (Jenna Jameson comes to mind). Plus its not up to me to judge what another woman has decided to do with her own body. Its just not my style.
Actually my main problem with porn is that it glosses over the most interesting parts of people. The flaws. In porn the women are perfectly blond and tanned, and while that's all well and good, its not real. And reality is the best part of sex. There's nothing like finding something on someone's body that's uniquely theirs. The mole right above their hip. Or the way a nose is slightly off center. The little blond hairs amidst all the black ones. The way their ear lobe is extra springy. The plumpness of a belly. All those little quirks are airbrushed right out of porn to make way for an idealized version of what women are supposed to look like. Which is boring to me.
When I'm with someone I like the sense of discovery that comes from seeing something no one has ever seen before. Its like discovering the new world without all the colonialism and small pox. Its fun. But in the porn that I have been exposed to (which is very mainstream we're talking playboy not midgets in bear suits doing donkeys) that just isn't there. And that saddens me, because the best parts of people, the things that make them really beautiful and worth knowing, is the mix of flaws and quirks that make them them and not someone else. I have no interest in perfect versions of people. Perfection is boring. And I'd rather get off on something real. Although this isn't to say that I want to watch your home videos, since you should know that no one wants to watch your home made porn unless of course your name is Paris Hilton or Tommy Lee in which case everyone is going to be watching.
That little rant turned out longer than I expected. If you're still bored, here are some links to keep you amused and away from the porn:
* An interview with the new folks on snl that have made the show worth watching again.
* "Fake Gay News, because real gay news is too damn depressing"
* Umm so some people really do want to ejaculate like a porn star...especially like this guy. To which I say ew.
* "4 out of 10 people think it's okay to talk on a cell phone in the bathroom"
* A cute little article on a Colombian musician who turns ak-47s into guitars.
* A great analysis on Matisyahu on Slate. The most interesting part for me was the last five paragraphs on how Jewish musicians/entertainers have been doing this type of thing for a while.
* The Men's Bill of Rights from Slate, continuing the conversation on the reproductive rights of men.
* How to be a good lover.
* Hello Kitty Waffle maker. Because waffles are just that much more delicious when they're shaped like hello kitty.
* The shame on you kit for those who want to be prepared for their one night stand with both condoms and a side of guilt.
* A surprisingly lucid interview with Macaulay Culkin from New York Magazine.
* The top 1000 list of books in public libraries in the US.
* Writing and drinking go hand in hand.
* A very funny video on the value of virginity. ps. this is soo not safe for work.
Actually my main problem with porn is that it glosses over the most interesting parts of people. The flaws. In porn the women are perfectly blond and tanned, and while that's all well and good, its not real. And reality is the best part of sex. There's nothing like finding something on someone's body that's uniquely theirs. The mole right above their hip. Or the way a nose is slightly off center. The little blond hairs amidst all the black ones. The way their ear lobe is extra springy. The plumpness of a belly. All those little quirks are airbrushed right out of porn to make way for an idealized version of what women are supposed to look like. Which is boring to me.
When I'm with someone I like the sense of discovery that comes from seeing something no one has ever seen before. Its like discovering the new world without all the colonialism and small pox. Its fun. But in the porn that I have been exposed to (which is very mainstream we're talking playboy not midgets in bear suits doing donkeys) that just isn't there. And that saddens me, because the best parts of people, the things that make them really beautiful and worth knowing, is the mix of flaws and quirks that make them them and not someone else. I have no interest in perfect versions of people. Perfection is boring. And I'd rather get off on something real. Although this isn't to say that I want to watch your home videos, since you should know that no one wants to watch your home made porn unless of course your name is Paris Hilton or Tommy Lee in which case everyone is going to be watching.
That little rant turned out longer than I expected. If you're still bored, here are some links to keep you amused and away from the porn:
* An interview with the new folks on snl that have made the show worth watching again.
* "Fake Gay News, because real gay news is too damn depressing"
* Umm so some people really do want to ejaculate like a porn star...especially like this guy. To which I say ew.
* "4 out of 10 people think it's okay to talk on a cell phone in the bathroom"
* A cute little article on a Colombian musician who turns ak-47s into guitars.
* A great analysis on Matisyahu on Slate. The most interesting part for me was the last five paragraphs on how Jewish musicians/entertainers have been doing this type of thing for a while.
* The Men's Bill of Rights from Slate, continuing the conversation on the reproductive rights of men.
* How to be a good lover.
* Hello Kitty Waffle maker. Because waffles are just that much more delicious when they're shaped like hello kitty.
* The shame on you kit for those who want to be prepared for their one night stand with both condoms and a side of guilt.
* A surprisingly lucid interview with Macaulay Culkin from New York Magazine.
* The top 1000 list of books in public libraries in the US.
* Writing and drinking go hand in hand.
* A very funny video on the value of virginity. ps. this is soo not safe for work.
marzo 15, 2006
Now with more sperm!
Normally I don't open spam. Its all "enlarge your penis" and since I have no penis, and I am not a teenage boy I'm not interested. Except today I saw something that I knew was probably spam but was intrigued enough by the subject heading. It said simply "hi, hit me." And I was like huh? What is this? So I clicked. And got a weird quote:
"The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning. We call a man a bigot or a slave of dogma because he is a thinker who has thought thoroughly and to a definite end."
So now I'm even more confused. So I clicked on the attachment. And I know I know you're not supposed to click on the link. That's just inviting your computer to get syphilis. But I was so curious. Sooo curious. I wasn't stupid though, I didn't download the attachment I just opened it in the browser. And what I got was this gem:
"More Sperm, means longer orgasms.
bigger stamina... Ever wanted to ejaculate like a porn star?
Worldwide shop
Act boldly and unseen forces will come to your aid. Evolution is not a force but a process. Not a cause but a law. The greatest difficulties lie where we are not looking for them."
First I have to congratulate whoever came up with this little spam campaign because it confused me enough that didn't just automatically delete it. Secondly how does more sperm equal longer orgasms? Like where is the correlation? I want to see some data, because I've never ever felt like what was keeping me from achieving an orgasm was a lack of sperm. Not once have I ever finished having sex and thought you know what was missing? Sperm. Lots of sperm. Oh and who wants to ejaculate like a porn star? Who is this person? I could understand wanting to be built like a porn star. Or wanting to have as much sex as a porn star. Or have your own line of dildo and dildo accessories like a porn star. But ejaculate? Seriously? That's a little sick, even for you.
And now the links:
* For some reason I'm noticing a weird news trend. First it was this. Which was weird enough. And then designer vaginas. But virgin cream? You have got to be kidding me. Of course I found all this stuff here.
* For those of you with a great love of strippers. I think its actually a very clever campaign. Cooler than that though is that I saw the exploding car exhibit that they're using as the banner at MASS MoCa last year. And it was awesome.
* The nutritional benefits of picking your nose.
* For those of you with a thing for gnomes.
* The only thing extraordinary about my high school was the marching band. Here's proof. When I saw Kanye's video for the first time I thought it might be them, but then promptly dismissed it because there must be a million BTW bands in the US. But then Jose and his ability to find the most useless things on the web persevered and we now have the link.
* I can't believe I forgot to link to this yesterday. Its both incredibly funny and a little too realistic for comfort.
"The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning. We call a man a bigot or a slave of dogma because he is a thinker who has thought thoroughly and to a definite end."
So now I'm even more confused. So I clicked on the attachment. And I know I know you're not supposed to click on the link. That's just inviting your computer to get syphilis. But I was so curious. Sooo curious. I wasn't stupid though, I didn't download the attachment I just opened it in the browser. And what I got was this gem:
"More Sperm, means longer orgasms.
bigger stamina... Ever wanted to ejaculate like a porn star?
Worldwide shop
Act boldly and unseen forces will come to your aid. Evolution is not a force but a process. Not a cause but a law. The greatest difficulties lie where we are not looking for them."
First I have to congratulate whoever came up with this little spam campaign because it confused me enough that didn't just automatically delete it. Secondly how does more sperm equal longer orgasms? Like where is the correlation? I want to see some data, because I've never ever felt like what was keeping me from achieving an orgasm was a lack of sperm. Not once have I ever finished having sex and thought you know what was missing? Sperm. Lots of sperm. Oh and who wants to ejaculate like a porn star? Who is this person? I could understand wanting to be built like a porn star. Or wanting to have as much sex as a porn star. Or have your own line of dildo and dildo accessories like a porn star. But ejaculate? Seriously? That's a little sick, even for you.
And now the links:
* For some reason I'm noticing a weird news trend. First it was this. Which was weird enough. And then designer vaginas. But virgin cream? You have got to be kidding me. Of course I found all this stuff here.
* For those of you with a great love of strippers. I think its actually a very clever campaign. Cooler than that though is that I saw the exploding car exhibit that they're using as the banner at MASS MoCa last year. And it was awesome.
* The nutritional benefits of picking your nose.
* For those of you with a thing for gnomes.
* The only thing extraordinary about my high school was the marching band. Here's proof. When I saw Kanye's video for the first time I thought it might be them, but then promptly dismissed it because there must be a million BTW bands in the US. But then Jose and his ability to find the most useless things on the web persevered and we now have the link.
* I can't believe I forgot to link to this yesterday. Its both incredibly funny and a little too realistic for comfort.
marzo 14, 2006
Only in dreams
My right knee looks like it has a black eye. Because I am a genius who at 22 still manages to have nightmares. The problem is not so much the nightmares but how real they are. I think that's the problem with all my dreams they're all a little too life like. This particular nightmare involved giant flying ants with big sharp teeth coming after me in my bedroom. And of course since I have freakish visual memory it looked exactly like my bedroom down to the pile of books that are currently on my nightstand. Now this whole nightmare thing happens pretty regularly about once a month or so. They started junior year at some point and go away and come back really randomly. This time however because I am genius, marks the first time I ever injured myself as the direct result of one of these nightmares.
Normally the way this goes is that I scream, jump out of bed, turn on the lights and promptly wake up, look around and then go back to sleep. This time however I managed to tangle my feet in the covers in such a way that my entire 108lb frame landed on my right knee. Hence the beautiful green and purple bruise that now accents my knee. Then some other less interesting stuff happened (Andy tells me that I tried to hide in the closet) but the most interesting part for me was that I didn't wake up until I was in our second bedroom where I woke up not from Andy telling me to calm the fuck down, but from the throbbing awful pain in my knee which was by this point bleeding.
This was Friday night. Its now Tuesday. And my knee is still bruised, but at least now I can bend it, which is nice. Since you know bending your knee is useful. When I told my mom about it she suggested that I start hiding my car keys so I wouldn't drive into a pole in the middle of the night. But I'm sure I'd wake up before then, at some point. Really besides the whole injury to my knee thing the nightmares don't really bother me. As soon as they're over I just go right back to sleep like nothing happened. It really just sucks to be Andy since he has to hear me freak out. But I figure it all evens out in the end.
* "That's right. The state legislature wants public libraries to keep their faggot books away from tender, easily influenced, God-fearing children lest they catch queer."
* "Women hate women. We all secretly think we're men." This quote is out of a discussion on rape on nerve.com. The first 2 pages I didnt agree with much of anything, but the third page really brings some really interesting things up.
* creepy.
* "Here lies Billy sperm ejected into a dirty sock." A political cartoon that while outlandish makes a good point about where we're heading.
* Good idea. Bad campaign.
* The aural times. Highly entertaining. Stolen shamelessly from my brother.
* I can't believe a guy that looks like this has the balls to write a book on manliness.
* A interesting post on the pros and cons of Fuck Me Feminism. Which sadly was not covered in any of my feminist theory courses.
Normally the way this goes is that I scream, jump out of bed, turn on the lights and promptly wake up, look around and then go back to sleep. This time however I managed to tangle my feet in the covers in such a way that my entire 108lb frame landed on my right knee. Hence the beautiful green and purple bruise that now accents my knee. Then some other less interesting stuff happened (Andy tells me that I tried to hide in the closet) but the most interesting part for me was that I didn't wake up until I was in our second bedroom where I woke up not from Andy telling me to calm the fuck down, but from the throbbing awful pain in my knee which was by this point bleeding.
This was Friday night. Its now Tuesday. And my knee is still bruised, but at least now I can bend it, which is nice. Since you know bending your knee is useful. When I told my mom about it she suggested that I start hiding my car keys so I wouldn't drive into a pole in the middle of the night. But I'm sure I'd wake up before then, at some point. Really besides the whole injury to my knee thing the nightmares don't really bother me. As soon as they're over I just go right back to sleep like nothing happened. It really just sucks to be Andy since he has to hear me freak out. But I figure it all evens out in the end.
* "That's right. The state legislature wants public libraries to keep their faggot books away from tender, easily influenced, God-fearing children lest they catch queer."
* "Women hate women. We all secretly think we're men." This quote is out of a discussion on rape on nerve.com. The first 2 pages I didnt agree with much of anything, but the third page really brings some really interesting things up.
* creepy.
* "Here lies Billy sperm ejected into a dirty sock." A political cartoon that while outlandish makes a good point about where we're heading.
* Good idea. Bad campaign.
* The aural times. Highly entertaining. Stolen shamelessly from my brother.
* I can't believe a guy that looks like this has the balls to write a book on manliness.
* A interesting post on the pros and cons of Fuck Me Feminism. Which sadly was not covered in any of my feminist theory courses.
marzo 09, 2006
me vale lo que piensen, hablen de mi es mi vida y yo soy asi!
I may or may not have cursed at a nun earlier this week. I'm hoping I didn't. But I honestly cant remember. It all happened so fast. I called to confirm my interview. She (the nun) said that my appointment was for 9am (which was exactly when I was calling) and I remember a string of curses in my head. I just don't know if any of them came out. Given my track record of cursing at insanely inappropriate moments (LD debate finals, summer 00' being broadcast live in front of a large audience being one of my more classic moments) I'm going to go with yea, I cursed at a nun.
The nun was of course nice and let me reschedule. Thankfully I don't want the job and was only going out of curiosity. Reasons I don't want the job include but are not limited to: it was located inside a church (working at a church would only reinforce my deeply buried catholic guilt), the pay sucked (my interview outfit cost more than I'd make in a week there), and you know I'm not staying in Erie so getting a job in Erie is kind of stupid.
Its funny because right when I'm positive 100% moving is when I start getting interviews. I got another call from a different place asking me to come in for an interview this morning. I haven't decided if I'm going to call them back or not. Its just cruel that just as I'm leaving and packing is when people want to interview me. My luck is all out of whack. But maybe this means that folks in Boston will get it together and call me back. Maybe.
*This post is a bit of a downer, but the most beautiful sum up of a breakup that I've ever encountered.
*Macho Macho Military. A good read if you're in the mood for some thinking.
*If you're not in the mood for something there's always this. To which I have to say that as someone who has read Marx, Foucault, Butler, etc I'm a bit ashamed by how much this site amuses me.
*People Houston whats going on? Don't embarrass me like this. Its not cool.
*Personally I always found the "de" endearing, but I can see why if you have no choice in taking its suddenly not so cute. Read about it here.
*Jack Nicholson is pure entertainment.
ps: if you can guess where the title is from I'll send you a cookie.
The nun was of course nice and let me reschedule. Thankfully I don't want the job and was only going out of curiosity. Reasons I don't want the job include but are not limited to: it was located inside a church (working at a church would only reinforce my deeply buried catholic guilt), the pay sucked (my interview outfit cost more than I'd make in a week there), and you know I'm not staying in Erie so getting a job in Erie is kind of stupid.
Its funny because right when I'm positive 100% moving is when I start getting interviews. I got another call from a different place asking me to come in for an interview this morning. I haven't decided if I'm going to call them back or not. Its just cruel that just as I'm leaving and packing is when people want to interview me. My luck is all out of whack. But maybe this means that folks in Boston will get it together and call me back. Maybe.
*This post is a bit of a downer, but the most beautiful sum up of a breakup that I've ever encountered.
*Macho Macho Military. A good read if you're in the mood for some thinking.
*If you're not in the mood for something there's always this. To which I have to say that as someone who has read Marx, Foucault, Butler, etc I'm a bit ashamed by how much this site amuses me.
*People Houston whats going on? Don't embarrass me like this. Its not cool.
*Personally I always found the "de" endearing, but I can see why if you have no choice in taking its suddenly not so cute. Read about it here.
*Jack Nicholson is pure entertainment.
ps: if you can guess where the title is from I'll send you a cookie.
marzo 07, 2006
sugar is only sweetness, salt is ocean tears
I'm mentally preparing myself for how incredibly lame next week is going to be. With Andy in New York for a conference I'll be in Erie, all by myself. For a week. Yea. Its going to suck. But its necessary. I'm moving out and I need to face that head on. As opposed to knowing I'm going to move and starting the process of packing but really pretending its not happening. I'm not moving. Let's not talk about what's going to happen. I guess when I go I'll take the pastry blender but leave the grill pan. But its not happening yet so why are we talking about this.
Without Andy to distract me though I'll have to get the boxes out and just start packing. So I don't know exactly what city the boxes are going to. I know they aren't staying here. And that's really all that matters right now. Plus its probably emotionally neater if I pack without Andy around being impossibly cute and making me think that maybe just maybe this place isn't so bad. Cause it is so bad. There's no ignoring that. Unless I started drinking heavily, which I wont do since my love for my liver knows no bounds.
So I'll pack. Cause boy do I own a lot of shit. Its mostly books. Cause getting rid of books just feels wrong to me. And I'll watch Sex and the City. All six seasons. Which will maybe get me through to Thursday. If I pace myself. Maybe I'll drink. That might make this whole thing easier.
uh that post was a downer. here are some links to get the taste out of your mouth:
*Turns out blondes have been having more fun for centuries.
*A really funny read about award winning movies that critics hated.
*Why its important to for journalist to just ask people if they're gay as opposed to just describing them with words like "flashy" and "coy". Read it here.
*Ride me bicycle panties. Its funny, cute, and gets your point across. Plus its for a good cause! (besides getting you laid)
Without Andy to distract me though I'll have to get the boxes out and just start packing. So I don't know exactly what city the boxes are going to. I know they aren't staying here. And that's really all that matters right now. Plus its probably emotionally neater if I pack without Andy around being impossibly cute and making me think that maybe just maybe this place isn't so bad. Cause it is so bad. There's no ignoring that. Unless I started drinking heavily, which I wont do since my love for my liver knows no bounds.
So I'll pack. Cause boy do I own a lot of shit. Its mostly books. Cause getting rid of books just feels wrong to me. And I'll watch Sex and the City. All six seasons. Which will maybe get me through to Thursday. If I pace myself. Maybe I'll drink. That might make this whole thing easier.
uh that post was a downer. here are some links to get the taste out of your mouth:
*Turns out blondes have been having more fun for centuries.
*A really funny read about award winning movies that critics hated.
*Why its important to for journalist to just ask people if they're gay as opposed to just describing them with words like "flashy" and "coy". Read it here.
*Ride me bicycle panties. Its funny, cute, and gets your point across. Plus its for a good cause! (besides getting you laid)
South Dakota is an attention whore
Here's the thing. I never liked South Dakota. I have never once thought about moving there or going there on vacation. In reality I think the only time I ever gave South Dakota any thought was when I was being tested on the locations of US States, which means (since I went to public school) were talking like 5th grade (right brent?). But we were never not friends. I didn't have any of the foul feelings about South Dakota that I had about other places like New Jersey (it smells), Arkansas (inbreeding), or Maine (seriously it might as well be Canada). Until now. Now South Dakota is dead to me. Its become more backwards in my mind than Mississippi (which I've actually been to and while beautiful is backwards). Ban abortion? Seriously? You're not joking? Your serious? Not joking? Uh you do realize that people have sex right? Like all the time. When they're not married. You see that chair? People have done it on that chair. That's probably cum your sitting on Mr. Governor.
The thing is abortion while unpleasant is like death and taxes. It happens all the time for all sorts of reasons and no one throws a parade when it shows up. You just deal with it and then have a snickers to take the taste out of your mouth. Blah whatever. That's all I'm going to say about that.
*Slate does a nice analysis of the inherent hypocrisy of the ban here. Its a short read I promise.
*A very interesing longer read on the interscetion of abortion politics and class, by Meghan Daum.
Oh and if you think that maybe I'm over reacting because you know I'm a man hating feminist (which I am ask my friends) you can read what South Dakota legislator Bill Napoli had to say about making exceptions to the bill:
"A real-life description to me would be a rape victim, brutally raped, savaged. The girl was a virgin. She was religious. She planned on saving her virginity until she was married. She was brutalized and raped, sodomized as bad as you can possibly make it, and is impregnated. I mean, that girl could be so messed up, physically and psychologically, that carrying that child could very well threaten her life." -BILL NAPOLI
Better yet you can watch it here.
He sounds like such a pleasant man, this Bill Napoli.
The thing is abortion while unpleasant is like death and taxes. It happens all the time for all sorts of reasons and no one throws a parade when it shows up. You just deal with it and then have a snickers to take the taste out of your mouth. Blah whatever. That's all I'm going to say about that.
*Slate does a nice analysis of the inherent hypocrisy of the ban here. Its a short read I promise.
*A very interesing longer read on the interscetion of abortion politics and class, by Meghan Daum.
Oh and if you think that maybe I'm over reacting because you know I'm a man hating feminist (which I am ask my friends) you can read what South Dakota legislator Bill Napoli had to say about making exceptions to the bill:
"A real-life description to me would be a rape victim, brutally raped, savaged. The girl was a virgin. She was religious. She planned on saving her virginity until she was married. She was brutalized and raped, sodomized as bad as you can possibly make it, and is impregnated. I mean, that girl could be so messed up, physically and psychologically, that carrying that child could very well threaten her life." -BILL NAPOLI
Better yet you can watch it here.
He sounds like such a pleasant man, this Bill Napoli.
marzo 05, 2006
Conmigo nada es facil
This weekend was actually quite enjoyable, thanks in large part to the obscene amount of money we spent at Banana Republic. Only problem was that both times we went into the store we were followed around. The first time it was by a hyper attractive black man, who was basically stalking us around the store. I looked at women's tops and he was there, I looked at men's ties and he was right there too. I thought maybe he worked at the store since he was never looking at the clothes just at us, and whenever I looked him straight in the eyes he would advert his eyes and pretend to look someplace else, but he wasn't wearing the requisite madonna headset they wear there. Of course Andy saw none of this because his paranoia does not extend into retail stores, just mine. The second day when we went in it was a smaller latino (possibly puerto rican?) man, who was a lot better at the stalking. He was wearing a headset so I know he worked for the store, and everytime I looked at him he looked like he felt really bad for following us around and promptly would move to another side of the store, which I appreciated. The thing was that its not like me and Andy scream "shoplifters" or even "thugs." We scream things like "return their library books on time" and "spend entirely too much time watching the discovery channel."
But whatever. On the way home I asked Andy what he thought the deal was and he of course was like "they weren't following us around, I figured they were just checking you out" which troubles me even more than them thinking we were shoplifters, since a) I was wearing a giant coat and there was nothing to check out and b) I was with Andy the whole time so who stalks someone's girlfriend around while the boyfriend is right there?
I almost wish Brent would have been there because both of us have a finely tuned paranoia that catches every weird glance and or glare in our direction, but alas Andy 's paranoia is limited to germs and me and whether or not I've cheated on him in the last five minutes.
But whatever. On the way home I asked Andy what he thought the deal was and he of course was like "they weren't following us around, I figured they were just checking you out" which troubles me even more than them thinking we were shoplifters, since a) I was wearing a giant coat and there was nothing to check out and b) I was with Andy the whole time so who stalks someone's girlfriend around while the boyfriend is right there?
I almost wish Brent would have been there because both of us have a finely tuned paranoia that catches every weird glance and or glare in our direction, but alas Andy 's paranoia is limited to germs and me and whether or not I've cheated on him in the last five minutes.
marzo 03, 2006
Hips don't lie
You want to know what's worse than your parents hating your boyfriend? Your parents loving your boyfriend. Whenever I talk to my mom its always "how's Andy doing? Is everything going well? I hope he's not working too hard" and I'm like mom get off it he's my boyfriend. Honestly I think the woman (if she could) would trade me for him any day. I can't blame her though, Andys obnoxiously perfect, she would have saved herself a lot of heartache if she'd just had him instead. But alas hindsight is 20/20.
*And seriously. Words cannot describe. Who needs an abstinence bbq apron? Although the iron hymen bears are cute, they could be misread as someone advertising that they like it rough as opposed to them not wanting it at all.
*this is just cool.
*The secret creative life of others. I always love watching in awe as someone I thought I knew blows me away with their real passion that they keep hidden. I think its magical.
*The news is depressing more than usual lately.
ps: wtf? via productdose.com
*And seriously. Words cannot describe. Who needs an abstinence bbq apron? Although the iron hymen bears are cute, they could be misread as someone advertising that they like it rough as opposed to them not wanting it at all.
*this is just cool.
*The secret creative life of others. I always love watching in awe as someone I thought I knew blows me away with their real passion that they keep hidden. I think its magical.
*The news is depressing more than usual lately.
ps: wtf? via productdose.com
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