family. what is that? some days i really sit here and just wonder that...maybe because i don't really know mine, because i know there's this huge chunk of people who are just wonderful and special like me and the reason ppl tell me that they've never met anyone else like me is because all the abad's and maz's are still in Colombia...i don't know. what i do know is that i'm thankful for the disfunction one that i have. someone who i didn't know lost their father during the weekend, i met the girl once or twice, a friend of a really great friend of mine here...and i just thought about my brother and my mom and my dad, and how it all doesn't really just work just right...and then i realized that it didn't matter. i have them, and i know who they are. and i know where they live and they are alive. i'm not gonna judge them or distance myself from them. i am my mother's daughter, my father's little girl, my brother's annoying little sister. that would be me. i used to miss the way things were before...and as i'm staring at the screen telling the void what i'm feeling its hit me that i'm lucky (and i don't believe in luck) my family works in its own way. and that's what i'm gonna focus on. not all the stuff that's gone bad, but all the little things that have gone right...its all about the little things....