tequila makes her clothes fall off

Having your very best friends on opposite sides of the continental US makes a girl sad. Impossibly sad on even the sunniest days. The whole idea of best friends is pretty laughable, and I use the term simultaneously as irony and truth. The idea rings back to a time long since past when who your best friend was changed by the week, dependent on which way the wind was blowing, and who had the best type of pudding at lunch. My best friend for ten something years was always the same person until there was a falling out, well I fell out, she stayed the same. But I like so few people and I'm so very fickle that these two who currently are my very best friends, really are my very best friends. They're stuck deep in my pit. And if I ever ponder for too long the reality of their absence in my life I want to just pack my bags and pick a coast just so at least I could be close to one of them.

Alas though, its not meant to be right now. Which sucks. An impossible amount. Because navigating time zones and work schedules and significant others makes the distance real. And reality and me aren't friends right now.

Technology makes everything better though. And I know I can always call and harass. But I miss being able to walk across the hall and walk into an unlocked room and steal some doritos and drink some rum and bitch about the day.

Essentially I miss college. In a way I never thought I would. I don't miss the papers or the classes or the books or the boondocks or the smell of manure. I don't miss any of those things. I miss skipping class to gossip on the hill and take in the sun. I miss the drive to Boston, and the singing and talking and daydreaming that killed the hour and made the traffic worthwhile. I miss having someone that made an hour and half drive in the middle of the night seem like a brilliant idea.

So yea that's where I am. Best friends on opposite sides of the country. No boy to daydream about. No escape. Just me and reality.

This growing up stuff, it stinks.